I was challenged to write what I do what I do. So here it is. My Origin Story.
When I was 14 years old my father bought me a bike for Christmas. It was a second-hand bike because we lived in housing commission. I remember feeling embarrassed and not good enough.
I remember that bike, the red frame, the way he rolled it in with such pride. I felt guilty that he took so much pride in it and I felt embarrassed.
We never had much money at home. Neither of my parents drove because we couldn’t afford a car. Mum was a stay at home mum, and she was always sick. Dad hurt his back when he was in his 40’s so he couldn’t really work after that. He tried different things, but nothing seemed to stick. I hated being the poor family.
When I was 14, we had a dress up at school and my mum made a black cape out of paper Mache for me, so I could look like a warlock. It was embarrassing, and I felt not good enough compared to everybody else. In fact, I always felt not good enough compared to everybody else because we didn’t have everything everyone else appeared to have.
See, I wanted to have the external look that said I wasn’t poor, that I was as good as others and a part of me was looking for validation, for inclusion and for the popular people at school to accept me. So I started studying eccentric things like the mind and extra sensory perception (ESP) because that made me unique. Really what I wanted was to feel like I belonged and I was accepted. I was missing that.
I can see now why I always had an interest in get rich quick schemes (although I didn’t do any) and was trying to learn about money. In my twenties, I was introduced to network marketing and I immediately thought this was the way out for me. Out of the shame I felt that we were not better off. I was lucky enough to connect with some millionaires and I started doing everything they told me.
Soon, I was making a little money and was at the front of the room as a leader. I felt good about myself for the first time in a long time. I felt that this was how I would find the peace I was looking for, and a way to heal the pain I felt inside. Over the following years, I made more money and climbed the ranks. I thought I was set.
And then it happened.
My upline jumped to a different opportunity and in 1 day my business collapsed. And with it my dreams. I tried to maintain it – but I couldn’t. All my fears of the past came back to haunt me. I felt lost. I felt hopeless again. I felt that there was no way I could ever escape the history of my family.
The epiphany happened slowly for me. I turned to personal development to heal my mind and fell in love with it. I fell in love with the concepts, and the help it could give people. Maybe this was it. It felt right. And so, I started a second journey.
I started my NLP studies and my coaching work. See, initially my plan was to heal my mind and return to the MLM space…and crush it. But life had a different plan for me. I discovered that I enjoyed coaching far more than the MLM business. I had to make a choice – go back into business or start a new business as a coach. I chose option 2.
My conflict now was that coaching paid very well and I didn’t think I was worthy of it. I mean, who was I – a kid from a poor family struggling with his own demons and identity – to coach people on their lives and business? And yet, I had a knack for it. There was something within me that connected with it. It certainly wasn’t easy for me – I still had to heal my own pain. But a funny thing happened.
The more I coached, the more I too was healed. The more I focussed on the other person, the greater my own fulfilment.
And I learnt something truly important. Our personal work never really ends. There is always a new level for us to get to, a new level of prosperity and abundance. And that new level comes with its corresponding work…internal work.
From those beginnings all those years ago I now run a successful coaching business, I’ve published my book, got my black belt in Karate, become an ordained minister and am studying for my PHD in metaphysics. I’ve come so far from where I was and am now blessed to be able to financially support the people that matter the most to me – my wife and family.
Now, I promise my clients one thing. I know what it’s like to feel unworthy, to feel like you don’t deserve it and to fight through the cloud of self-doubt and self-judgement. And I know what it takes to step out of it and strive toward your goals.
And that is what I offer, because deep down, I know the pain and I never want people to experience that pain. Life is worth more than that.